Tuesday, April 2, 2019

I've Got You

Two days ago, I was able to finally access my icloud, which has been locked for more than two years due to forgotten passwords and codes and failed verification procedures.
Reading through my notes, I was transported back to Qatar in 2016-2017, only this time as a third person reading through "Honeylette's" mind.
While the pain is still the same and so real, what amazes me is her hope, surrender, and faith in God's plan.
Truly, as Ate MeAnn put it, "We'll never know that is God is all we need until God is all we've got."

"Thank You, Father, for saying, "Do not worry my child, I've got you."

"Thank You, Lord God, for reminding me that having faith in You will indeed make all things bearable and possible. Please hold us closer to Your heart during our down times, and do not let us go no matter how hard we struggle. Help us surrender to Your will and continue to live within it and not against it. Because surrendering in Your will means accepting all of Your provisions and putting You in charge in our life's battle, in Jesus name I pray. Amen."

Thursday, March 21, 2019

Hope and Surrender

Last night, I dreamt about you 
Wearing exactly the same clothes; off to fetch our kids

And while everyone around you was awed to see 
You moved freely with no sign of disability

I miss you
I wish we can all just wake up from this 

But I know that the Lord's plans are greater
I'll hold on as I surrender 

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
 Jeremiah 29:11

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

How to Prevent Financial Loss That Goes with Death

More than a week ago, a former co-teacher and a friend died at the age of 35 due to complications of high blood pressure shoot up and stroke. She left her husband and three sons; 7 years old, 5 years old, and 7 months old. 

Please do not take this as an insensitive post but rather respond to this with urgency. While we can never prepare for an emotional loss, one can lessen the impacts of death by preventing the sudden financial loss that goes with it.

My husband was totally disabled at the age of 33 due to a brain injury secondary to cardiac arrest in 2016. At the age of 33, I was a struggling mother of 2 and 5-year-old daughters and a hurting wife.

The following year, we've lost a friend and a former classmate, age 33, due to complications of ectopic pregnancy and a friend's husband died due to a vehicular accident at the age of 34. The list goes back to our batchmate who was disabled the age of 32, a classmate who died in his late 20s due to an aggressive disease, and the one that our batch lost when we were still in college due to a vehicular accident. All of them have left a hurting family. 

These are real stories of real people who are close to me and for sure, you know a number of the same cases, too: sudden death or disability at a very young age.

 If you suddenly get sick and need a long-term medication, who will pay for the bills and medication?
 If you meet an accident, who will pay for your treatment?
 If you suddenly die for whatever possible reason, who will provide for your family? 
Who will pay for the bills, for the food on the table, and for the kids' education?
 Can your spouse provide for these alone?
 Is your current savings enough for all of these needs?

Would you rather sell your hard earned house and car in the future rather than start saving now? Would you rather risk the possibility of your children dropping out of their classes because no one will pay for their expenses anymore?

In our case, when my husband was disabled, we were able to claim a critical illness benefit from his life insurance with Manulife enough for me to have time in setting up the rhythm of our new normal before I started working again (I will have a separate post on this.). 

Life insurance is NOT an additional expense. Life insurance is a form of savings that will save you and your family in the future when you will be needing money the most. It will protect your family from the financial loss that goes with sickness, disability, and death.

My friend,  my job is to help you prepare in protecting your family's future while you can. What I can do for you is to make sure that your spouse and children will have enough to keep them afloat when you're gone. Because when your time comes, sympathy and moral support alone will not be enough. What they will need more, other than prayer, is the financial stability as if you are still there. Financial stability that only you can provide. Now.

Let me help you.

Financial Advisor
Manulife Philippines

Saturday, September 1, 2018

When The Skype Haunts

I heard the Skype ringing
I searched for my laptop, it was off
The Skype kept on ringing
I reached for the plug, it was tangled

I needed to turn on the laptop
The Skype call might end
I must answer it

I started crying
I slammed the laptop on the floor
"Why wouldn't you turn on?!"

The call ended 

I listened hard
No more ringing -- only sobs
I was awakened by my sobs
It was just a dream 

A nightmare

My heart wanted to make that Skype call
But no one will answer
Glenn is not on the other line.

Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Huwag Kang Mapagod Kaibigan

"Napapagod akong mamalengke mag isa.. 
.. nakakapagod magbuhat ng para sa isang linggo supply na kailangan ng walong matanda at     
   dalawang bata
.. nakakapgod isipin ang pakiramdam ng may kasama mamalengke na magbubuhat ng higit   
   sampung kilo mong pinamili
.. nakakasawang makakita ng mga mag-asawang magkasama.."

Sa kabila nito.. alam kong MAPALAD AKO

wag kang mapagod mamalengke kahit mag-isa, dahil mapalad ka na meron kang perang pambili habang ang iba ay wala...

wag kang mapagod sa mga gawaing bahay, mapalad ka dahil ang iba ay walang tahanan..

wag kang mapagod kung may sakit ang iyong asawa, dahil mapalad ka na sya ay kapiling mo pa  habang sa iba ay pumanaw na...

wag kang mapagod kung nawalan ka ng asawa..
mapalad ka dahil ang iba ay nawalan din ng anak..

wag kang mapagod kung nawalan ka ng asawa at anak..
mapalad ka sa iyong mga magulang, kapatid, kamag-anak at kaibigan
habang ang iba ay lumaki na sa ampunan, iniwan na sa home for the aged, o di kaya'y napilitang mag pakupkop sa gobyerno dahil sa naranasang pang-aabuso..

wag kang mapagod kung isa ka man sa kanila, dahil mapalad ka na may kumukupkop sa iyong institusyon habang ang iba ay namamatay ng mag- isa sa kalsada na walang nakakapuna..

wag tayong manatili sa pagkapagod, bagkus bilangin natin at ipagpasalamat ang mga biyaya na bigay ng Dakilang Lumikha

Sunday, April 29, 2018

To Our Youngest


I'm sorry 
    if most of the time I scream at you
    to go away, to stay out of the room or simply not to step on my things.

I love you.
It's just that Mommy is having a hard time dealing with her emotions.
At night when I come home, usually, nothing is left but tiredness and irritation.

I am sorry if most of the time I let the steam out on you.
I love you, Bulilit.

I am praying for your young heart and mind
  to understand my situation --
  our life.

I am sorry if I am asking too much from your little heart.
But really, you are stronger than Mommy.
I am learning to deal with life the way you do.

I love you.

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

The Happiest and Proudest Father in the Universe

Last Thursday, my mother’s officemate gave our daughter Cassey two fifty peso bills. When we arrived home, she smiled, handed me one of the fifty peso bills and told me she’s going to pay for Daddy’s nurse. I smiled at her, thank her and told her that it is not enough. 
She then asked me how much does she need and said, “Huh? I need four hundred more?” 

As a father, Glenn did everything he can to provide for our needs. He did everything so that he could give, as much as possible, all that our children asked for. And it is overwhelming to know that what our six-year-old daughter first thought of doing with her money was to pay for her Daddy's nurse; not to buy anything for herself but for her dad. For sure, Glenn is very proud of his princess.

This reminds me how God as Our Father also has done so much for us. How much He loves us.

"We love because He first loved us." -1 John 4:19

He provides us everything we can think of.

"Our God will supply all our needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus." - Philippians 4:19

And He grants as much prayer requests as possible, according to His will.

"For this is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of him." - 1 John 5:14-15

And if like our child, we first think of giving back our time, treasure and talent to Our Father, for sure He will be very pleased with us. He will be the happiest and proudest Father in the universe.

Father God, Thank You for Your provisions. Thank You for the gift of life. Thank You for our families and friends. Thank You for our children. We thank you for Glenn's continuous healing. Continue to bless us so we can share more of Your goodness with others. In Jesus name, Amen. 

Last night after checking her bag, she was beaming as she showed me a five hundred peso bill and said,

“Mommy, I can now pay the nurse.”

I smiled at her and said, “Ok, go to Daddy’s room and give that to his nurse. Tell Daddy you love him and that you paid for this shift.”